76

by kamikaze picnic

76 cover art
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1.
07:36
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2.
01:20
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3.
01:53
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4.
02:40
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5.
01:47
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6.
01:14
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7.
03:11
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8.
01:37
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9.
01:16
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10.
03:01
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11.
02:11
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12.
00:51
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13.
01:40
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credits

released 01 April 2012

tags

tags: pulp rap New York

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Track Name: story
Ragwipe hears knocking and opens his door.
"If you cleanse you'll make amends and purge the evil spores," his visitors say.
“Who are you?”
“We are the Worry Warts. May we permeate your sleeping cell?”
They sit in Ragwipe’s house on soft sacs, the typical furniture arrangement, though his are nicer and newer.
They offer him a 3 page general-interest pamphlet called Cleanse! It covers science, nature, and geography, with a germaphobic slant.
They give him a complimentary bottle of disinfectant and ask, “May we swab your nose?”
“What for?” he asks.
“We want to determine your level of contamination.”
The Warts leave and Ragwipe goes into his garage and wipes his go-kart down.
“What did those guys want?” Storewide Clarence asks, as he strolls towards Ragwipe.
“They said we could get infected by living so close to the rats.”
“Oh.”
"We can't let these Worry Warts get the best of us," Ragwipe says.
"There's nothing to worry about except worry itself," Storewide claims.
“Just to be safe, let's disinfect ourselves,” Ragwipe says.
They apply the sanitizing body gel.
“I found this notice in your mailbox,” Storewide says.
“Who’s it from?”
“It’s from the Realitors. ‘Maintain your gardens to beautify the area and attract more tenants.’”
“I’ve been meaning to go down there. I think I could be a Realitor.”
“I can’t see it. Those guys are way different.” Storewide says.
At the Realitors’ office, Ragwipe meets with Don Dharma and asks, “Can you awaken the businessman inside of me?”
“There is dormant business knowledge inside of everyone. The only question is can you become aware of it?”
“Can I become a disciple to learn it?”
“Start small. Demonstrate an understanding of garden care. It all starts there. That‘s where Glob first revealed itself to me.”
Ragwipe returns home and finds two rats rummaging.
He chases them out of his house and gets bitten, so he goes to the pharmacist.
“Your arm is swelling. It looks like rat trap fever.”
“What do I do?”
“Stop letting the rats bite you.”
“Can I have medicine?”
“I’m out of shots. You can make a junk shot.”
“How do I do that?”
“It’s just a little bit of junk and the sperm of a skunk and boom the disease is for the most part sunk.”
As Ragwipe returns home, he passes Jim Journals, who reports that men of the Rim used to be pioneering heros but are now seen by many as bourgeois disappointments who keep their go-karts in the garage.
When Ragwipe returns home, the Worry Warts are waiting for him and request to escort him to their compound to meet their leader.
As Ragwipe approaches their compound, which they call the Clock Tower, he sees a giant clock moving in reverse.
“What’s that clock for?” he asks.
“It’s our countdown to Germageddon.”
“What happens then?”
“Only the cleansed will resist the germs.”
Once inside, Ragwipe is led to a large circular room where he stands on a glass floor.
He looks up to the glass ceiling but the light is blinding.
A voice says, “I’m analyzing you.”
The figure turns the light off and descends the stairs.
Ragwipe looks up and says, “Is that a giant microscope?”
“You are living in a dangerous time and place, and you could be a pivotal figure in the war on germs. Where you live overlooks the Gram Canyon, and that is ground zero for Germageddon.”
“What is Germageddon?“
“You might not understand it yet, but knowing a little history about us might help. I used to work at Garbatron, have you heard of it?”
“Yeah, it’s a waste management facility.”
“Right. I stumbled upon old sanitation manuals in a box in the warehouse and I saw a greater truth in them. I shared my awareness and was eventually fired for espousing radical views on waste management. So, I formed an independent group to study the manuals. Those manuals became the scripture of the Worry Warts. We accept the Manuals as scientifically reliable and interpret much of it literally, but what’s most important are the parts we view as symbolic.”
He shows Ragwipe a Manual and opens it to a symbol.
“There is a force that unites all decaying matter, called Glob the Great Permeator, and it is logical to believe that Glob opposes germs that tarnish it. Take a copy of the Tower Tattler before you leave. It will inform you of ongoing worries and events in the Tower. I have many things to do now, but you are welcome to tour our facility and we’ll be seeing each other again, Cat Man.”
“Why did you call me Cat Man? And what about Germageddon?”
“‘Til next time.”
Ragwipe wanders the Clock Tower, and he meets a woman who is undergoing the initiation program, a three week cleanse of the mind and body.
Ragwipe is smitten with her and they speak about hope for the future.
"Doser is going to help everyone. He's making a cleanser to kill all germs inside and outside of the body. We’ll drink it daily."
"You don't look like you need any more cleaning," Ragwipe says. "You have a doll's face."
“That’s the pinner. I’m a hag, really.”
They speak quietly until Ragwipe is asked to leave by the underling.
Ragwipe calls a meeting of the Men of the Rim and announces they are in danger of getting infected by the rats and he is starting a Ratist organization, to wipe them out.
The Ratists walk in a parade singing the Junk Island anthem.
They smear sanitizing liquid on steering wheels of parked go-karts.
While Ragwipe returns home at night, the rats jump off of his roof and bite him.
He shrieks wildly and runs away.
Ragwipe goes to the Clock Tower but the Worry Warts won’t let him in because they fear his germs.
They tell him to go into the cleansing tank on the side of the Tower, which is an emergency wash station.
He steps inside and it fills up with a sweetly smelling air, then gases shoot from jets in the wall and they foam up and smell like peach.
Then the walls close in and soft pads scrub his body.
The foam enters his pores for the ultimate cleanse.
Ragwipe returns from his cleansing and vows to wage war on the rats.
He launches a cleansing of Junk Island using industrial cleansers that burn the nostrils. As Storewide carries the gear, Ragwipe announces through the megaphone that Germaggedon is coming.
The Worry Warts drink Doser’s daily concoction, which removes all the impurities from their bodies, and they stride enthusiastically, claiming they have been delivered by Glob to a cleansed temple.
They come upon a trash bin and discover local layabout, Wigh Wormington, sleeping among the cushy trash.
"Trashophile be cleansed!" they yell as they douse him.
Ragwipe spots this and yells "Stop! He's a human being."
"All must be cleansed," the Warts say.
"No, not if he doesn’t want it."
"This is the wash war. Immortal cells are the link between generations and must be kept pure in the war on germs. You must seek release from germanity. Drink this!"
The Ratists reject the offer to be released from germanity, with Ragwipe spitting on the Warts who fight back with cleanser.
Ragwipe enters the Clock Tower and visits the woman he adores and says, "I'm rescuing you."
They hug and when he kisses her she says, "We must not spread germs."
Ragwipe says, "It could have been sweet."
Track Name: soft sacs
I sit on soft sacs
Makes it nice to relax
Maybe I could fall out
Napper has a relapse
If I’m gonna be that
Addict that falls flat
Making up a weird world
Automatic mind maps
Gotta sit upright gonna feel uptight
Company makes me wide eyed eye sight

Wake up and stay awake
Wait until night breaks

Sitting on soft sacs looking like bean bags
Trying to entertain guests when I’m in my tight pad
Just like a tight space ain’t no myspace
Can’t do much to my page, redecorate
Now they want to test me offer me an agent
Worry like a wart about germ containment
Not my thing don’t want to get swabbed
If you want to test me I’ll talk about glob
Sitting in my pad with proselytizers
Pseudo science separate siders
What about germs? I don’t want to fear
Want to keep kind and conscience clear
I’ve got an ear open for amends
But I don’t want to break and I don’t want to cleanse
Track Name: swab my nose
swab my nose
got no cold
not a home to germs
my milky nostrils haven’t turned
double spies, mucus wise
now you see I’m clean
don’t be acting so surprised
I can keep my nose upright
That’s right, blow away like an exhaust pipe
Intake all night
Tissues white as snow
I wake up and blow

Swab my nose
Keep me clean, baby

may we come in, get under your skin
cut off your kin, help you begin
to cleanse, we’re your friends
just drop your former obligations
cleanse yourself of complications
predetermined by the vermin
that destroyed your pure descent
If you cleanse you'll make amends and purge the evil spores
Got the urge to purge all the spores you horde
And the heart worms that you can’t afford?
If you let us turn them out
With a microscope and probe your mouth
and go inside and shine a light
on germs in cells, we’ll help you fight

Swab my nose
Keep me clean, baby
Track Name: garden care
this goes out to the garden gnomes
to the frozen people guarding homes
naked garden, shape and rake it
save your seed and softly shake it
and the inside people on the phone
if they can’t connect then they go to roam
naked garden, shape and rake it
save your seed and softly shake it

I can care for gardens
I can rake around the sand
I can beautify the land
I can make it with the plans

Starving gardens need our touch
When shaving flowers of their rust
We buff and polish, make ‘em shine
Lead the coarse barbed wire vine
Brush the brush and push the divots
Let the bloom be soft as rickets
In appearance but the core
Must hold up under garden chores
Track Name: dormant businessman
there’s a businessman inside of me
sleeping like a dragon
mythical, magical, no pants-saggin
ready to jump up on the bandwagon
with positive thinking I’m fanatical
the weekend’s the deep end
a street wear sabbatical
back to business casual
buffing god’s cuticles in a gray carpeted cubicle
that would be the workplace, jerkface, wear suits by Versace
meet up with a woman take to it back to her place

Is this the faceless man of the future filling blank book pages
In your scrapbook, leader and sadist from the dark ages
Born to kill the merry man
Authoritarian, tyrannical married man
Dinner in the pan yet?
Is my dinner in the pan yet?
What’s cooking in the kitchen?

It’d better be something delicious for my palette
A de-muscled animal
Bought, put on the counter, hit with a mallet
Tenderized under your tender eyes
Don’t ever take your ring off. I get scared you’ll cheat
We’re married now, eating ground up cow
Our children are overweight, isn’t this great?
Got emotion locked up in incarceration
I promise this administration will practice sedation
Through all legal means, sex, alcohol, American dreams
Tough on thought crimes of the next generation
I went to work and I expect a standing ovation

Is this the faceless man of the future filling blank book pages
In your scrapbook, leader and sadist from the dark ages
Born to kill the merry man
Authoritarian, tyrannical married man
Dinner in the pan yet?
Is my dinner in the pan yet?
What’s cooking in the kitchen?
Track Name: bourgeois disappointments
I’m a bourgeois disappointment
Cause I’ve got a garage
And I tend to my garden
Cause I’m loving the mirage
Had the first freedom and I traded it in
For a bump up in class and my isolated bin
Thought I was a hero but the tide must’ve turned
And perception is a worm, once severed, still firm
Maybe I’m indulgent but it doesn’t make sense
To expect a man to keep his mind inside the past tense

I think I’d rather own but I won’t own myself
Got a couple trinkets and some things I can loan
Guess I’d need a woman though to call it a home
Track Name: rat trap fever
bad shiver. Deep in my liver
can I get a white blood cell count
and a strong metaphor for the male version of menopause
change is strange
i have a visitor, it’s shiva
she’s a pleaser of either death or destruction
my body’s a dungeon
my bed sheets get a little wetter
my eyesight gets a bit tender
the lights in my room are bright as winter
The sun is soft and simmers on the horizon line
I quiver
No fight
In cold light
I would run away but I can’t take flight

just set me free in the wasteland
and put my soul in a casing
just turn me into the pavement
you’ll see that I’m worth saving
you’ll walk on me for a reason

that’s rat trap fever
gonna need a junk shot
why’s this happen?
Maybe rats like you
Maybe you invite it
I couldn’t really say
Can I have medicine?
No I’m out of that today
But you can make a junk shot
knock out a blood clot
gotta stand still like you’re trapped at the bus stop
For how long? 24 hours
I recommend a media shower
tell me how to make it
just a little bit of junk
and the sperm of a skunk
and boom the disease
is mostly sunk
one more time
just a little bit of junk
and the sperm of a skunk
and boom the disease
is mostly sunk

just set me free in the wasteland
and put my soul in a casing
just turn me into the pavement
you’ll see that I’m worth saving
you’ll walk on me for a reason

I got myself, my soul, my source
Track Name: one kart garage
how’s my space? not too large
cleaning a one kart garage
how’s my smile? Not too wide
just a grin to wipe my ride
how’s my face? Not too long
hold a grudge for did-me-wrongs
how’s the hate? Not too heavy
here come rats. Now I’m ready
how’s my space?

Spacious space, oh spacious space
How’m I gonna defeat this race?
Spacious space, oh spacious space
What wipes clean the furry face?

off the roof, at my throat
come at night, come to fight
I just want to have escape
Saw Dark Knight - stole his cape
Hold up. Where am I at?
I'm having dreams of rats
Need cat woman’s claws and scratch
Gotta bake another batch
I feel the pain and slip
Deep inside a dirty grip
I should just annihilate
I will be clean…I can’t wait
Deep inside germs from rats
That I hate, I will eradicate
All the random rapes of tiny cells
Gonna build me up to health
Track Name: cat man
I’ve always been a domestic cat
Tea time feline, picture that
hunting vermin and household pests
my hair stands up when I get stressed
purr and trill, hiss and growl
a flexible body and long meow
quietly watch, observe your flaws
Biting my tongue, retracting my claws
Catch noise at a higher frequency
My gift is uneasy destiny
My blessing is something’s calling me way out in the galaxy

Go, meow, criminal now
Killing another for dinner, the chow
Over my lips and under my teeth
I’m eating the rats, because I have beef
Stirring em up, mixem with sow
Sauce on the side, the general tso
Feeling invincible, predator principle
hurting me now? No hurting me(ow)
Track Name: microorganism ft understudy, chaz kangas
microorganism

microorganisms are causing our disease
it’s hard to control so I’ll set your mind at ease
antibacterial compounds kill
but the hygienic practice is also fulfilled
in the pamphlet of prophecy
wash your hands constantly
come in for a session, wash your insides out
if you feel lost in a fungal jungle
ring up the worry warts, germs be humbled
save your soul’s medicinal chemistry
subject yourself to antimicrobial therapy
if you resist our pharmacodynamics
die with the rest and when it’s too late, panic (oh, no!)

microorganism make me feel this way
get out of my body throw disease away
Track Name: germageddon ft bs
looks like destruction
smells like trouble
something’s gonna burst
maybe I’m the bubble
watch it, clock it, no, we can’t stop it
knowing is awful, the pain of a prophet
maybe it’s a wedding of body and setting
or soul sick dreading of bacterial betting
but what’s the probability? Wager the artillery
warfare, battle out germs, little worms, little microbes
finding their way through our eyeholes
I hose the bad cells
Symptoms are little tells
That we’ve got a bad one
Now we get the germ gun
Now I’ve got a bad one
Now we get the germ gun

Blast through germaggedon!
Blast our way. germaggedon’s here stay
Track Name: this is 101 (bonus)
you got 99 problems I’ve got two more son
it doesn’t mean I’m bragging, it’s 101
from California to Washington, U.S. Highway 101
fahrenheit fun or celsius sun. Burn you to a crisp at 101
school of hard knocks, it hurts to be dumb, you’d better wise up, 101

welcome to my class
no hall pass
you can’t leave
there’ll be no reprieve
makes your brain work ‘til it dry heaves
now you’re gonna puke up all the excess
because your culture’s full of excess
keeps you low brow without access
to a higher, wiser practice. 101
Track Name: human shields (bonus)
all out drive
he’s on an all out drive
for prosperity
economic prosperity

setting a vision for a nation with a strong military and food donations
from the U.S. don’t be useless, army and people, they should possess
a strong conviction to end their lives if kim jong eun needs to survive
maybe abusing human rights, and run out of food like every night
but that’s just how it is, that’s just how it is

all out drive
he’s on an all out drive
for prosperity
economic prosperity

this goes out to the kim family, they ruled for 63 years
he can’t have y’all holding on to life, just because of your fears
and if y’all are ready to die tonight as a human shield say “yeah”
said if y’all are ready to die tonight as a human shield say “yeah”

kim jong eun needs human shields
you’ve got to lay it down
that's how he feels